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My 8-year-old was not invited to one of her best friend’s party. She is really upset about this. The mom and I are friends. Should I ask her what is going on and why she wasn’t invited?Given your friendship with the mom, definitely ask her what is going on. Perhaps she was invited and the invitation went missing in the mail, or she was inadvertently left off of the list.
If you find that this is not the case, and she was simply not invited, you may want to ask your friend if something has come up between her daughter and yours and get her thoughts. Do not ask for an invitation to be extended in this case, rather simply gather a good understanding of what is going on from your friend.
At this point, ask your daughter directly about her relationship with this friend? Did something happen at school? Are they still as close as ever? Are cliques forming that you may not know about? She will have some good insights on what’s been going on lately. You can also share what you learned from your friend to piece the puzzle together.
If it is a mean-spirited gesture just to keep your daughter from going to the party, this is very cruel and at the age of 8 is very painful. By discussing it openly, you may be able to help her remedy the situation or help her accept it. When the party day arrives, you may want to do something special with her, such as a trip to the movies, to take her mind off of being left out. It will still be very upsetting, but by providing an alternative activity she will be able to focus on something positive. That’s really important.
