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It has happened to all of us, we have a very good friend that we have known since school days and the history is long and goes way back. Still, recently, you and your friend may not have seen eye-to-eye on a few matters, and don’t even see one another much any more. Still, you remember her birthday, her wedding anniversary and, of course, her kids. Given the history, you send gifts to her kids on their birthdays.
Now, in the past she always would ring you and say thanks, have her kids write a little note to you, or something to let you know those gifts meant something and were appreciated by them. Recently, however, you are still giving gifts and not hearing anything back.
Do you keep giving those presents or simply give up and drop them off your annual gift list? It is a difficult decision. You have a long history with this person. You have always given the gifts, and to not do it may mean you are moving on from this friendship.
If this person is someone who you cannot bear the thought of letting go of, then an honest discussion about the situation would be helpful between you both. Perhaps she doesn’t feel right with you giving gifts any longer, as she cannot reciprocate, and she needs to tell you this. There could be so many reasons for the lack of a thank you or any type of acknowledgment. Get it out and discuss it rather than continuing to gift with nothing in return.
On the other hand, though you have been close in earlier time in life, look at what the relationship has become and make a decision from the current situation. Without any acknowlegement of the gift, you have no idea if it was received or appreciated. In this situation, you are doing out of obligation rather than out of true friendship that works both ways.
Everyone is busy, either talk about it with your friend and plan on how to handle gift giving next time, or let it go ~ it may not be worth the time, energy, and effort any longer. You’ll know what to do depending on your particular friend and situation.
